September 2009
15 posts
I have dramatic friends who make a big deal out of things that don’t even matter. It’s like hanging out with Cubs fans on opening day.
I was telling my dad about an audition and how it could change my life, and I hoped I did well. And he says, “You know what I hope? I hope the Cardinals get some fucking pitching!”
I read an article that said losing weight will give you a bigger penis. I don’t know if that’s true, but I do think it’ll make you more likely to show it to someone.
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